Restless

She sat in the room, lights off and listened to the sounds outside. She could hear them; snuffling, rutting, squealing. The hogs. Wild creatures taking over Kiara's property and the surrounding countryside. Free from the constraints of morality, responsibility and personal relationships. How she longed for that freedom. To do as she pleased and when she wanted. She felt electrified. The touch of cloth, wood, mattress, each sparking a jolt of energy that coursed from her nerves, through her body and ultimately to her brain. Barely contained energy she wanted to release, like the lightening that just cracked through the night, but was fighting to control. Not yet, she felt. Not yet. She has to see that woman. Ms. Ida. Something about that name pushed at the edge of memory. As she lay back on the bed and closed her eyes, she smiled and thought, "At least I don't have to watch her flitting around my head." Her weakness had gone to attempt contact with Kiara. Rihanna smiled. "Good luck!"

I cruised back and forth over Kiara's head. "Kiara! Kiara! KIARA!" I yelled louder each time I said her name but she couldn't hear me, only a "buzzing noise." Sissy, why does she, I , me...whatever, keep calling Kiara sissy? Most likely to sound tough and confident, if I know myself, which at this point I wasn't too sure if I did.

I believe the Meanie Me (thanks Austin Powers) hit the nail on the head with the Star Wars reference. This situation was far more Dark Side then possession. I know Kiara knew I was present. I floated after her as she stomped to her room, cat and dog in tow. Cat! That's it. I'll get Kiara's attention through the cat. If I know my pop culture, some people believe that cats can see human auras and the psychic energy that surrounds them. Maybe Cleo would "see" me and alert Kiara with a hiss or meow.

I buzzed Cleo's head. Nothing. I buzzed her again and she just turned her head and ignored me. Typical. The third time, I screamed as I buzzed her, causing the cat to leap in the air, subsequently landing on the bed and yowling up at me. Kiara spun around and yelled, "What the freaking hell!"

Eureka! In response, I reached out and grazed her hair with the tips of my fingers. Her hair fluttered slightly. She smoothed her hair back down and looked in the air around her.

Hank was whining, but Cleo had grown bored and begun to lick herself.

"Who is that?" Kiara asked. She bit her lip thoughtfully, "Rihanna, is that you?"

It was a simple question, full of hope. Gleeful, I messed her hair again, this time with both hands.  Her acknowledgement of me seemed to give me more substance.

"Hang tight, Rihanna. I really feel that Ms. Ida, or her house, is the key. However, I think I might have to call The Mother (our pet name for our mom) and get her opinion. She may have some new agey way of reuniting yourselves." Kiara sighed. "I am so tired."

She looked tired. Her eyes were red and her shoulders slumped and I knew that I was to blame. My desire to be free from responsibility and to be able to just have a good time had become such an obsession that it consumed me.

That desire manifested itself as my dark alter ego. Somehow, my dark alter ego grew strong enough to evict my good parts. If we didn't figure something out soon, I didn't know if my good side would be capable of reuniting with my dark side. If I am not able to pull myself together, I will be forced to lead this split existence until the day I die. And then what will happen?